Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Tonight was left overs.....

I'm so fucking hungry.  If anyone calls me right now okay before noon tomorrow and offers food.. I think I'll be in love.. Man, Women, Cat, Dog doesn't matter.. I need some food. 

Here is what is in my fridge.. leftover pokey sticks.. grape juice.. water.. left over bad Chinese food (that the puppies love)mmmmmm I'm hungry so hungry.. I will do my hungry dance now.. if you ever see me in person ask about my hungry dance and I just might show you....

time to find more food to fill my belly that is starting to grow big and fat.. hehe...

Tuesday, June 29, 2004

mmmmmmmmmm the sweet sweet smell of...

Pokey sticks n' Beer. They should package it up and send it over the world... we would then have world peace. I love me some food.

Well my little Food Junkies did you miss me? yeah sure I know..you lost some weight while I was away.. sorry. I'm ready to plump your ass up.

Since I last wrote in this thing.. I have feel in love with Loon Sheng. It is fucking awesome and everyone needs to go try it. It is on rangeline in the Gerbes parking lot. Please do your self a favor and try the Broccli with Garlic sauce.

I have decied Chef's are way sexy. So I'm addicted to the food network. I'm thinking about going to food school. I know I know what it is called but food school sounds way fucking cooler.

Anyone that wants to send the food school info my way please do so...

fuck MILO is trying to eat my food.. gotta run...

Tuesday, June 08, 2004

yummy in my fucking big ass tummy...

That is right kidos.. I'm not as lazy as I was.. I brought back my food.. and love for it!!!

Monday, January 26, 2004

I don't have comments or my site meter. I don't know how or where to do that stuff at Jon always did that stuff before so maybe he'll do it again soon.

Wednesday, January 21, 2004

People, hang in my blog has lost it's mind.

Tuesday, January 20, 2004

Well, here I go and bitch and complain mean while Jason did come through for me. So, this is where I tell you a little bit about Jason my first guest blog buddy. He loves music and gets bored all day. Thankfully when I am bored he is there to help out. His blog is updated way more than mine and he always makes comments (I love for people to do that). So read below and check out his blog it's worth going to daily trust me I know...

Nightshift at the Kentucky Fried Chicken - Resident Jason

When I was in high school I took a job at the local Kentucky Fried Chicken. It was decent cash for a high school sophomore. I got free food and soda. We (Clint, the owner's younger son who was the same age as me) listened to Bad Religion, Screeching Weasel and NOFX all evening (except when I worked with the owner's elder son who insisted on "Workingman's Dead" by the Grateful Dead. To this day, I can't stand the Dead).

I was banned from the drive-thru speaker after being employed there for only two weeks when I welcomed customers to "Kentucky Fried Children." Hey, I was fifteen and bored on a Tuesday night. Not finding the humor in it, the owner placed me in the back with the flour and the fowl. It sucked ass. Making the chicken wasn't so bad, but making the cole slaw was a bit arduous with the chopping of cabbage and all.

Like any business, you'd get your regulars. There was the old guy who ordered three original recipe legs (with extra grease). The overzealous soccer dad who wore the same gray coaches shorts - no matter what the temperature was - always order a 21-piece extra crispy dinner - no thighs, no legs, no wings, no fun. This forty-something, housedress-wearing lady used to come in one a week, order a 15-piece family dinner, a 32 oz. Diet Pepsi, and sit and eat the whole thing. She always left one of the six biscuits untouched. We would inspect the bag after she left because we couldn't believe one person could eat all that. Sure enough, those bones were picked clean. I always felt guilty afterwards like we were making fun of her. It's not so much that we were making fun of her, as it was just utter shock and awe we felt that one mortal could eat so much in one setting.

Completely off the subject here, but what's with the super-sized diet soft drink? I've never understood this. It appears to me that a lot of over-weight people will order the fast food with the highest content of fat (I'm generally standing behind them in line preparing to order the same heart-attack-waiting-to-happen food, so I know this) and then offset it with a diet soda. I don't play those psychological games with myself. Never have. I'll go with a Dr. Pepper (which contains zero prune juice, according to the Food Network special on this nectar of the gods) where available. I will settle for a Coke as my second choice.

Back on the KFC tip, I fondly look back at my life in the fast food lane and can't help but get a wee bit misty-eyed. I'm serious. The old guy is most certainly dead. The soccer dad most likely has shrinked his order down to a three-piece dinner for one, as his annoying, sports-are-my-life demeanor has to have gotten to his wife by now. What about the 15-piece dinner for-five-but-eaten-by-one lonely, overweight lady? She is the one I find myself thinking of the most.

I know it's been a while but I've been waiting for Jason to send me his guest blog. He hasn't yet so go to his blog and tell him I want my guest post.

Jon moved me down on his link sidebar tell him that is total bullshit. What he has no love for food now?

Well, I was bored and I found a great website for all of you fatties that still want to eat fattie food but loose some weight. Here you go.. click it you can check out the calories and other things about your favorite fast food places.

In non food news. Guided by Voices was cancelled, and Jon is going to dj at Shattered tomorrow. My life has been dull and my whole not eating out but one day thing is keeping me from reviewing places.

I will have to cook something.. Maybe...

maybe Jon will cook for me.

Tuesday, January 13, 2004

It's 2004 and I'm as lazy as ever and haven't updated shit.

Lets start with December 31 2003.
I went home after work changed into better clothes. I let me cutie dogs out, Ava and Milo. I then walked in to the kitchen and heated up this salsa and cheese thing that a I created. It had cheese from the jar for the bottom layer then I fucked up and dumped in sour cream (isn't that a food sin ruin your tasty dinner by dumping gross sour cream on it?) the next layer was hot salsa (Jon likes it so hot it's gross) for the next layer I put on more cheese then medium salsa and finished it with lettuce and shredded cheese.

So that salsa thing is heating up in the oven while I'm sitting back drinking some Bud Light. I woof the dinner down and the beer. It was wonderful. While I'm in the middle of scrubbing. Jenny my sister shows up (who by the way hasn't e-mailed pictures from that night) she looks at my food like it's disease. So she's hungry of course I'm still hungry. Jon walks in next he's wanting beer. So, I give him my debt card and send him off to the store. Mean while Jen and I order Pizza Hut cheese breadsticks and 2 litter of Pepsi.

Pizza man comes, Jenny and I are quick with stuffy are faces. In walks Jon with my beer, oh wait he didn't buy Bud Light
he bought Boulevard unfiltered wheat! He tries to tell me they are all sold out. I find this hard to believe but let it go since it's beer. Jon finishes off the rest of the food. I must say I find this beer very delish.

I am tipsy and cut Jon's hair and do Jen's make up. I did a ton of sparkles on her face and on mine. I get a call from my other sister Rachel. I am to meet her in the parking garage at ten. I ask if she is festive, she seems frightened by this and replies that she does have make up on.

Well Jen, Jon and I finish food and our drinks (Jenny is a Pepsi person at this point). We load up and are of to the parking garage I find Rachel and she is not festive. I put on her bright blue and pink sparkle eye shadow also a shit load of Bee's Wax in her hair. She also got pretty girlie barrettes. We are off to Shattered FINALLY!!!

Well, it was your normal night I guess. This is the first time I ever went out. Rachel was drunk and dancing with the Tommy Hilfiger guy that I growled at when we first walked in. Later Jenny was getting doubled up on by two Mexicans. I had some tall ass mother fucker trying to dance with me and boy did he get rejected. Jon well he was drunk and didn't dance that much. I was dancing with Jen and this girl plowed into me and acted like nothing happened so I elbowed her. Bitch turns to me and says "There is no need for elbows" I reply with "this is how I dance" I continued to flap my elbows around like I was a chicken. I did it nice sharp and hard. She backed away and started staring I said what and she left.
I hate it when rude people bump into me, especially when I'm drunk.

Jon's brothers where their, Adam and Andy. It was great to see them. It seemed like it did years ago. I had a lot of fun talking to them. Andy even danced with me. His brothers are great guys but no girl better hurt either one of them. If I see it I think I would have some words.

When they did the count down Jen pulled out her phone and they time on her phone said 12:15 so I don't really know when midnight came but I was blowing bubbles and jumping up and down.

We left the bar I think when they kicked everyone out. I'm not really for sure. I do know that we went to I Hop later. This was going to be my first meal of 2004! It would set the standard.

Well, at I-Hop we give our name and wait in the colder part. In walks these six old people 3 grammy's and 3 grappy's. The women where whining. The men where groaning and sucking up to the cop. A big bench fills up inside and the women go in and the men stay and talk about how they are getting some. Like before I eat I want to hear about how 60 year olds are talking about humping! So they are seated way early, I go in and talk to Rach and Jen they say one of them is the Aunt of Josh Kroenke who is an MU basketball player. That they lady was going on how she was related to Josh and shouldn't have to wait. If that isn't tacky enough remember we are at fucking I-Hop for shit sake! So this one guy comes up the name taker and it turns out that they lovely party of old fuckers took his name when they called out "Green" so they could get seated earlier. That poor guy and everyone else like me had to wait an extra ten minutes because some tight ass old bitch didn't learn in kindergarten to wait her turn. FUCK RICH OLD BITCHES!!!!

So, finally I am seated everyone orders. I get a veggie omelet. Jon get's this one skillet that always makes him gassy. Jen got French fries and Rach ordered never ending pancakes. The food comes and it is gross. I remember almost falling asleep because I was so bored and tired. The waitress if you can call her that never filled my water. We saw her only 3 times at our table. I love that shit the waitress's do when they fucked up and hand you your bill and say things like "I hope everything was good" or "have a great day" trying to kiss ass at the end is fucking dumb. It only ticks me off. Well, Jenny my sister is a wateriess so out of pitty she got a good tip.

My first meal of 2004 was a veggie omelet from I-HOP. One thing I kept wondering and still am were where they veggies. All I could taste was cheese. It is what you would expect to get at I-Hop at 2 in the morning.

That was my New Years. First time I went out and I'm going to do it again, maybe next year I'll eat at Denny's instead.

You like it fast and strong and you drink for one reason: to get piss-ass drunk!
Congratulations!! You're a shot of some good old
hard liquor!

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So I did this quiz thought it would be funny now I feel like puking.