Lets, just get right to it. Okay?

Friday 11/14/03
I went home and had beer and Italian Village pizza. Now, I love their pizza, I really do. It was very good. Sometimes the artichokes make the pizza soggy but on this night it wasn't the case. Well, after dinner and beer I went out with Lindsay and Lisa. This night was a bit ridiculous. I made a very big decision: From Friday on I wouldn't put up with any shit from those frat guys. I'm going to get that mace that Sal told me about and if anyone calls me a cunt again that is what they get. Other than that event the night was good. After we left Eastside Tavern and the Ramada Inn parking lot, McDonalds sounded excellent. My stomach was a little upset at this point and I thought food was the answer. Isn't it always?

Well, about 6 o'clock in the morning I woke up with the worst stomach pains ever. It was... the pizza. I was sick all of Saturday. Not good!

Saturday 11/15/03
So I was sick. Oh what fun times. So, Jon helped out a great deal on my day of illness. He and I bopped over to the Olive Garden (warning this review is not for the PG crowd) for dinner. First we give our names. I spot some seats in the packed with people waiting area! Right on. It was really crowded and I was happy to sit down, what with the stomach cramps I'd been having. Little did I know that we would be graced by a celebrity. Yes, we fucking had one sitting right next to us. I didn't know Harry Potter was real until that moment. I felt so blessed. Kid was obsessed. Right down the striped shirt and everything. Well, after the rug rat left, the ugliest people started pouring in. This one hostess had on the most god awful watch I had ever seen. When I saw this pink, rhinestoned square that took up about half of her lower arm, I almost bolted. Really if the people make you gag, what is the food going to do? I already wasn't 100% food ready. After what seemed like an eternity, we were seated. The table was good, small and in the corner. Little did I know some psycho girl would be staring at me through at the whole dinner. When I go out to eat I didn't know it was so others could watch. She was really creepy but, I'll get into more about her later. My first notice is damn, it's fucking cold! Good thing I wore a shirt, sweater and a Men's Navy pea coat. I had my little green thumb monster to entertain me while this waitress tried to figure out if she should help us. It was so nice and wonderful when she finally came over. I was thirsty and wanted my damn water. We ordered. We waited, and waited. Finally Breadsticks show up! Only three though, what do I look like an anorexia case? I want to fucking eat and I want to now! She also decided to ruin my day by informing me that they were making fresh salad and it would be a moment. So I eat my one bread stick (because Jon was more hungry than me) and waited. Finally the salad! I start serving it out to Jon and then myself, We unroll the silverware and to our surprise, dinner is here. WHAT THE FUCK! Salad and dinner at the same time! How, How? Damn, lets just say I'm pissed. That is putting it nicely. So, I eat the salad- not bad. She brings back more breadsticks. I take a bite of my orginal breadstick and it tasted of pure garlic and seasoning. My mouth thought for a moment I played a mean trick and that there wasn't bread. All I tasted was grainy seasonings. Right when this happened it burned my mouth. I was unaware that over flavoring of garlic and who knows what else burned your mouth. Where in this hell was my warning label? So, I finally start into my Pasta and tomato dish. I am noticing at this point and so is my thumb monster that this annoying girl keeps watching me eat. Every time I look up she is staring. At this point she is now smiling at me! What the fuck is wrong with her? Do, I have a horn on my head or something? Really, lady you are ruining my mood. My reaction to the first bite of pasta is "oh my god they serve this to people, and want them to like it". At this point the Salad is the best thing. Remember, it is fresh. So, I give my self another plate of salad. By this time it's the bottom of the bowl. Much to my surprise fresh salad seems to mean brown, old lettuce at the Olive Garden. That is good to know next time, I'll ask for the old stuff and see what happens. So, the breadsticks are a wash and so is the salad. Back to the pasta. With each bite it slowly begins to taste a little better. It's growing on me, kinda like mold grows on cheese. This lady who is our waitress is horrible when it comes to refilling my water. I finally take all I can get of this meal, it's time to go. At, this point I have all of the buttons on my coat buttoned and I notice if hell is the hottest place imaginable, then Olive Garden is the complete opposite of hell. It was North Pole in there. The waitress brings the check. The staring girl is still staring. My thumb monster is ready to go and I don't blame him. I grab an Andes Mint and take a moment to notice the best food of that night was the fucking mint. The place was loud, full of fools in black and gold with cat ears, temparture was bad, wait staff was revolting... Overall I would say it sucked. It was one of those dinners where all you do is laugh.

Sunday 11/16/03
No, this doesn't deserve a full review but, here we go. At the Mall Christmas shopping. Oh joy! Nothing puts you in the spirit than the Olive Garden rejects and their idea that they can run you over! This day was wonderful. Still, not 100% as far as the stomach goes and I have people thinking that we are reenacting Days of Thunder. So, after lots of diving I was hungry. What a surprise. I saw the cookie place, Great American Cookie. First my mom's are better, so there. Second I notice they don't have a nutrition fact sheet (but, do I really want to know) Third, on of the displays of they wonderful cute and edible cakes they make is a pig, can you guess what the pig is eating? Time's up, it is saying pig out! Doesn't that really make you want to eat it? It is taunting me telling me I will becoming fat just like the others in line. I say fuck the pig, fuck them all and I order a double doozie. Now, I know your asking "What in the world is a double doozie?" Well, pull your panties out I was just getting to that. A double doozie is two large cookies filled with frosting. I ordered a chocolate chip one. It was good and tasty. The soda I had (I know slap my hand, soda = bad) the girl (yes, girl because anyone this stupid can't be a women) filled my cup to the top with crushed ice. Do you know what happens when you fill a soda cup to the top with crushed ice then put Coke in? You don't? Well you get two sips of coke out of a medium drink, isn't that fun? Over all I would say don't get sodas at the cookie place, don't date the workers at the cookie place, it is best if we all just stick to the cookies at the cookie place.

Crap, now I have that song "who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?" stuck in my head. Today will be long, I can tell but, rewarding I have potatos at home.